Thursday, 30 April 2009

Intimacy

I'm a bit of a sci-fi geek, much to the derision of certain of my colleagues. It's a form of escapism, but what really interests me is that it offers the opportunity to explore relationships, albeit in alien environments. Last year I treated myself to a subscription with Audible which has allowed me to "read" a number of books that might otherwise have remained overlooked on the shelves of the bookstore. I'm currently "reading" Red Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson, which tells the story of a group of scientists who go to build a colony on Mars. These words struck me today:

"People didn't realise that true intimacy didn't consist of sexual intercourse, which could be done with strangers and in a state of total alienation. Intimacy consisted of talking for hours about what was most important in one's life..."

These words are spoken by the psychologist, (who is on the verge of losing the plot) about a counselling session with one of the colonists. What he says makes some sense to me - there is an intimacy in the therapeutic relationship where the client may well be sharing things they have never spoken of before, or possibly never even admitted to themselves and where they are being met by the therapist at a deep level. But of necessity that sharing is one-sided - the client is sharing whilst the therapist is striving to meet with them at that depth. It is a form of intimacy, but is it true intimacy?



1 comment:

  1. MMMMMMMMMMM! I wounder that form this intimacy takes in the theraputic relationship?

    I looked up the meaning of intimacy as follows

    noun, plural -cies. 1. the state of being intimate.
    2. a close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person or group.
    3. a close association with or detailed knowledge or deep understanding of a place, subject, period of history, etc.: an intimacy with Japan.
    4. an act or expression serving as a token of familiarity, affection, or the like: to allow the intimacy of using first names.
    5. an amorously familiar act; liberty.
    6. sexual intercourse.
    7. the quality of being comfortable, warm, or familiar: the intimacy of the room.
    8. privacy, esp. as suitable to the telling of a secret: in the intimacy of his studio.


    Not sure about number 6 but the rest seem ok to me. Do we experiance these in the counselling relationship?

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