The Quality of Presence

Walking down the street today, listening to my new book on my iPod shuffle, I was struck by the number of people also engaged in listening to iPods or talking on mobiles and I had to jump out of the way of people walking along and texting at the same time. I found myself wondering how present are we in our daily lives these days? So much of the time we are effectively absent - talking on the phone with someone who is elsewhere, listening to music which takes us away from the reality of the present moment, or in my case visualising the intricacies of life on Mars as I listen to my book.

Before I got my iPod I used to practice mindfulness meditation as I sat on the bus or walked along the road. I was fully aware of my surroundings - the sights, the sounds, the smells, the taste of the traffic fumes on my tongue, as well as being aware of myself in that setting - the feel of my feet on my ground, the sense of my body moving through the air, the sensation of my inbreath moving through my nostrils and into my lungs. These days I'm probably just about aware enough to be able to manoeuvre my way through my fellow pedestrians or not to get run over when crossing the road. I don't have the same sense of my journey to work or of my relationship with my surroundings or with the people that I encounter along the way. It seems to me that we have got used to a life lived in distraction elsewhere, rather than being truly present in each moment of our lives.

I wonder what impact that has on us as therapists or on our clients. Is it harder these days for us to really be present with each other or does it make that therapeutic hour more precious - a time when we can put aside all distractions and really be together in relationship?